Ejaculation Control Training
Learn how to last longer in bed and be the man who blows your lover’s mind.
You have three options…
â–˛ Watch the training video
â–˛ Listen to the audio-only version
â–˛ Read the guide further down on this page
Ejaculation Control Training
Table of Contents
-
-
- Introduction
- How to Last Longer During Sex
- How to Prepare for Sex
- Daily, Long-Term Practices to Reprogram Your Sexual Response System
- Things to Watch Out For
-
1 – Intro to Ejaculation Control
2 – How to Last Longer During Sex
3 – How to Prepare for Sex
4 – Daily, Long-Term Practices to Reprogram your Sexual Response System
5 – Things to Watch Out For
1. Intro to Ejaculation Control
What is premature ejaculation?
I define premature ejaculation as ejaculating before you want to during sexual intercourse. That could be in 1 minute or 12 minutes…
And if you regularly struggle with premature ejaculation, you don’t need me to tell you how much it sucks.Â
I promise you it is possible to cure premature ejaculation and last as long as you want in bed (without worrying about any form of erectile dysfunction). You just have to put in the work. If you want to go ahead and take major action in this area of your life, you could sign up for my Orgasmic Mastery Course.
If you only do the exercises in this free training, you WILL see major results.
What causes premature ejaculation?
If you’ve ever ejaculated before you wanted to, you are normal. You’re actually winning in terms of biological procreation.
Think about it… back in the prehistoric days, it wouldn’t make sense for you to take 20 minutes to ejaculate… As a man, your sexual response system was designed to ejaculate easily.
If you needed 20 minutes to ejaculate, you might get eaten by a predator, or killed by an enemy group of humans before you could procreate.
But!
Today you have a choice. You don’t have to worry about getting killed while you have sex…
You can choose to learn how to last longer in bed. You can choose to make love for 20 minutes, 30 minutes or an hour or more. You can even choose to have multiple orgasms without ejaculating.
I can tell you this from first-hand experience.
I used to be the guy that would cum in a minute or less… to say I struggled with premature ejaculation would be an understatement. My sexual confidence was almost zero, and I would actually avoid sexual encounters because I was afraid of ejaculating too quickly from how much pressure I put on myself.
Turns out I wasn’t alone… I recently surveyed my Instagram followers, and got hundreds of responses from men and women.Â
Check out these results from my survey:
- 87%Â of men have ejaculated before they wanted to
- 38%Â of men have avoided a sexual encounter because they were afraid of ejaculating too quickly
- 90%Â of women said they have had sex with a man who ejaculated too quickly
Interestingly…
- 80% of women said they have had sex with a man who could last as long as he wanted, but…
- 54% of these women (the 80%) said that their sexual experience with a man who could last as long as he wanted was negative. Why? Because while being able to last as long as you want in bed is important, jackhammering a woman without any connection (like what happens in porn) doesn’t make for good sex.
Think about this…
- 40% of women said they have had sex with a man who was intentional with his ejaculations, and…
- 95%Â of those women (the 40%) said this sexual experience was positive. Many said it was the best sexual experience of their life.Â
In order to be intentional with your ejaculation, you have to heal your premature ejaculation, which could be “caused” by anything from poor masturbation habits and addiction to porn, to tension in your body (like high blood pressure) and mental anxiety. This training will help you create new habits that will reprogram your sexual response system and teach you how to last longer in bed for good.
How to last longer in bed
The good news is, if you want to increase the length of time you last in bed, you need to do these two things:
- Develop your ability to control your arousal (aka sexual energy)
- Increase your capacity to experience more pleasure without getting overloaded by it and having the only outlet be ejaculation.
The rest of this training is devoted to these two things, and these two things are what make up the art of sexual stamina.
It’s not as simple as learning one technique. Anyone who tells you that is misleading you.
That’s why this training includes a bunch of techniques for you to try, and if you regularly do the techniques in this training, you will see results.
Remember – mastering the art of ejaculation control takes time, commitment and practice. You are responsible for the quality of your sex life.
Let’s get into it.
2. How to Last Longer During Sex
These actions will help you manage your energy and arousal during the sexual experience so you can last longer, and they’ll help you experience MORE pleasure if and when you do eventually choose to ejaculate.
Empty your bladder right before sexual activity
If your bladder is full (or even partially full), it can create pressure in your pelvic region. Specifically, a full bladder can put pressure on your prostate, and that pressure can lead to tension which will push you closer to ejaculation.*
*Some guys can have an ejaculatory orgasm through prostate stimulation alone.
If you notice you need to pee at any point during sex, take a break and go to the bathroom. There’s a reason it’s called “relieving yourself.” Any tension in the body will bring you closer to ejaculation, so the more you can relieve tension and pressure, the better off you’ll be.
Breathe deeply
I’m not talking about taking a single deep breath, I’m saying that you should consistently take full and deep breaths with ease and confidence while you make love.
Shallow breathing leads to premature ejaculation.
Breathing deeply will help relieve tension, relax your entire body, and will spread pleasure throughout your body and will avoid too much stimulation localized in your cock (which leads to premature ejaculation).
Treat this as a practice, and begin as soon as you start foreplay. Continue while you make love, and know that this isn’t something that’s going to come naturally – it’s going to take effort, and it will be worth it.
You might not notice much of an impact for the first few deep breaths, but stick with it because by the time you get to breath 10 and 15, you will feel a MAJOR impact.
Think of what happened the last time you ejaculated. Chances are your breathing became shallow and fast… This shallow and fast breathing leads to ejaculation, and it begins well before the point of ejaculation too. So you can keep yourself away from ejaculation by breathing deeply, with ease.
Make sounds of pleasure
Most men are quiet during sex.
We often leave our partners wondering if we’re enjoying the experience or not, potentially leading to relationship problems. I used to be silent during sex until I came, and then I would make a little bit of noise, and my girlfriends would be like “where did that come from!?”
Ejaculation happens because of a buildup of tension in the genital region, tension in your entire body and “mental” tension in your mind.Â
Making sounds is a great (and fun) way to discharge this tension – and it’s a great way to make sex more connective & enjoyable.
So… what noises should you make?
Make deep, easeful noises on the exhale in combination with your deep breathing practice. If you need to start with smaller noises just to become comfortable, that’s fine too… Remember, learning how to last longer in bed is a practice. It takes effort.
Get into your wild, animalistic self. Breathe and make sounds from this place. Most women crave this, and most men are too timid to go there because we’ve been over-feminizedÂ
Don’t rush into penetrative sexÂ
Take time to enjoy every part of your partner. Pay attention to the connection you feel with them. Revel in the fact that they want you to fuck them. Feel that in your entire being. What a luxury…Â
Notice their hair, their eyes, their hips, the way light bounces off their lips. Kiss them, and slow things down. There’s no need to rush… and breathe deeply and make noise during the process. When you get to penetration:
Try this:
Enter your partner with your cock, and then stay still and breathe for two minutes… Penetrate them with your heart, your eyes and your breath. Ask them to breathe with you. Take the reigns of sexual leadership and guide them in deep breaths with your breath. They probably have never experienced anything like this before, and it will drive them wild.Â
When you do start to move… move really slow for the first 10 minutes… Really, really slow.Â
Most women are used to guys getting inside of them and jackhammering, and that being the main type of sexual activities that occurs gets old after a while. Then the guy either cums too quickly OR he goes numb and goes into some egotistical fucking spree that lacks connection with the woman, and often leads to the woman experiencing some sort of pain.Â
Don’t be that guy.
Start slowly. Kiss their neck, run your hands through their hair, massage their shoulders while you slowly move inside them, potentially even giving her a bit of clitoral stimulation. Practice breathing deeply, and allow yourself to make sounds of pleasure.
When you go slow like this with a woman, you’re giving your her a chance to open more and become even more wet… You’re creating a chance for her heart and soul to welcome you into her entire being. It’ll drive the majority of women wild.Â
Another benefit of starting slow is that you’re giving yourself time to adjust to the warmth and juiciness of being inside your partner.Â
Think about this…
NBA players don’t just jump right into the game… they stretch and warm up first… giving their bodies & minds a chance to acclimate to the new “environment” so they can play at their peak.Â
The same can be said for sex – your cock, body and mind need a chance to acclimate to this new environment. If you start slowly and take a good amount of time to acclimate, it will be much easier for you to last longer without ejaculating even when switching to new positions.
And again, remember to breathe deeply and make sounds of pleasure.Â
Pause when necessary
If you’re getting too close to ejaculation, and you want to keep making love, take a pause.
Give yourself a chance to cool off.Â
During this pause, you can pleasure her with your mouth or fingers, or you can just hold each other. Remember to breathe deeply and make sounds during this pause to move your energy.
In my survey of hundreds of women, the majority said the most important part of sex to them is the connection they experience with the man. They would MUCH rather a man pause and stay connected than ejaculate too quickly and go into a refractory period of disconnection.
Change how you react to ejaculation
This is one of the most important things in this entire ejaculation control training.
If you ejaculate before you want to, the way you react will either make or break your sexual experience (and connection with your partner).Â
If you ejaculate and then get visibly disappointed and sad, you’re either going to put your partner into a mode of caretaking, or a mode of pity, or both. That will kill any possibility for more sex in that moment, AND it’ll hurt your relationship.
On the other hand, if you say “wow – that felt amazing” or “holy fuck you were so hot I couldn’t control myself” and you work to stay connected and pleasure her more, you’re going to have an entirely different set of side effects.Â
If you take the second option, chances are you’ll have another erection in 5-10 minutes and will be able to have more sex.Â
TRY SAYING THIS:
“Wow baby you are so fucking sexy it just pushed me over the edge. Now… I want to pleasure you before I get hard again. How would you like me to pleasure you?
Boom. See what happens when you try that. It’s a game-changer.
3. How to Prepare for Sex
This section has two parts. The first part is full of things you can do right before sex (if you have 20 minutes or less to prepare). The second part is full of things you can do if you have hours to prepare before sex.
Part 1: Things to do right before sex
Get Into Your Body
- Do 50 jumping jacks
- Do 30 pushups
- Do plank pose for 1 minute
Why?
Because if you are in your head you’ll be more likely to ejaculate too quickly, or you might not even be able to get an erection at all.
If you are fully present and in your body, you’re more likely to experience pleasure in your entire body (and not just your genitals).Â
Reduce Tension and Create Ease
- Take 5 minutes to stretch your body. Focus on stretching your legs, hips and your groin. Most men are notoriously tight in their hips, and this tightness leads to tension, which leads to premature ejaculation.Â
- Take 5 minutes to breathe deeply. That means to do nothing else. Sit in stillness, and slowly breathe full inhales and exhales with ease… paying attention to only your breath. I recommend setting a timer on your phone so you don’t have to think about how much time has passed.Â
Decide that you are going to last longer in bed.
Do not underestimate the power of your mind’s ability to control your ejaculation. If you decide, with conviction, that you are going to last longer in bed, that’s exactly what will happen.
Part 2: Things to do earlier in the day before sex
Cardio
Make time to get in 20 minutes of cardio exercise. Just 20 minutes of cardio has been shown to reduce stress, boost confidence and increase sexual performance via blood flow related mechanisms. 20 minutes of cardio will also improve your overall mood and increase your ability to assimilate new information (all this ejaculation control stuff).
Go to a Yoga Class
A good yoga class will get you into your body with spaciousness and ease, and it’ll help to strengthen your deep breathing practice which will carry over into the sexual experience – which will help you last longer in bed..
Breathe Deeply
Yes, here it is again… If you make breathing deeply a practice and do it throughout the day, you’ll train your system to be more relaxed overall. Remember – tension leads to premature ejaculation. Relaxation and deep ease lead to being able to last as long as you want in bed.
4. Daily, Long-Term Practices to Reprogram Your Sexual Response System
This section is full of things you can do every day that will begin to fundamentally shift who you are as a sexual being. With consistent effort, the actions in this section will reprogram your sexual response system to experience more pleasure, more connection, and a vastly improved ability to last longer in bed without worrying about ejaculating.Â
Change how you masturbate
The way you masturbate has a direct effect on your ability to last as long as you want in bed.Â
If you masturbate for only 2, 3 or 4 minutes at a time before you ejaculate, you are training your sexual response system to last only 2, 3 or 4 minutes. On the flip side, if you masturbate for a minimum of 20 minutes before you ejaculate, you will train your sexual response system to last 20 minutes.
Here are some ways to masturbate that will improve your ability to last longer in bed:
- Masturbate for a minimum of 20 minutes before you ejaculate. Set a timer.
- Focus on internal sexual pleasure and sensations (instead of fantasies in your head).
- Learn more about your body and what makes you feel good (for example, a lot of guys are really sensitive on the head of the penis).
- Practice breathing deeply.
- Make sounds and moans of pleasure.
- Focus on having an easeful – relaxed presence. Smile to yourself and see just how much you can enjoy this non-rushed experience of sexuality.
- Shift your focus away from the “goal” of cumming, and simply make “pleasure” your goal.
- Bonus tip: use sex toys like a cock ring to increase the stimulation to train yourself to handle more intense sensations.
If you masturbate this way three times a week for a month, I guarantee you will be able to last longer in bed.Â
But beware – this is where most men fail…
Most of the men who learn this stuff learn it intellectually, but never do the embodied practice… then they’re confused why they’re not able to last longer.Â
That would be like buying a membership to a gym, watching 10 YouTube videos on the best ways to work out, never going to the gym, and then being surprised that you’re not getting stronger.Â
Don’t be that guy.Â
Changing the way you masturbate can be the single most important thing you do to improve your ability to last longer in bed.Â
Get regular exercise (Cardio and strength training)
Your physical health has a direct impact on your sexual performance.
Studies have shown a direct link between lack of physical inactivity and lack of sexual potency. That should be all the convincing you need…Â
How are you going to have sex for a half-hour if you get tired after 5 minutes?Â
If you can’t get your heart rate up for 20 minutes without being tired, how are you going to have an hour-long multiorgasmic lovemaking session?
Think about this…
When you get physically tired in sex, you’re more likely to ejaculate because that tiredness will create some amount of stress response (you’re having to use more energy to hold your partner or yourself up). Stress creates tension, and tension leads to premature ejaculation.
If you’re strong and you have a high amount of physical endurance, this won’t be an issue.
I recommend a minimum of three 20-minute cardio sessions per week, and 2 strength training sessions per week. Side note – doing strength training with your legs has been shown to increase testosterone levels.
Cardio could be going on a run, bike ride, pickup basketball game and/or any of the cardio machines at the gym. Strength training could be weights at the gym, sets of pushups & situps.Â
Also…
One of the other major benefits of cardio is the impact it has on your brain. Neurogenesis is the creation of new neurons in your brain, and this is stimulated by cardio. Cardio promotes the production of new neurons in the learning & memory sections of your brain, and cardio increases your overall neuroplasticity.Â
This means if you regularly do cardio exercise, your system will be more able to learn and integrate new information than someone who doesn’t get cardio.Â
Learning how to last longer in bed is no small task… and your brain & sexual response system is going to need all the support you it can get.
Which leads right up to the next major lifestyle change:
Stop masturbating to porn
Porn is unrealistic, but that shouldn’t be news to you…
What might be news is just how much impact a porn habit can have on your sex life – and your ability to control when you ejaculate.Â
Three problem areas of porn
- Porn focuses on the cumshot
- Porn focuses on “parts” of people, rather than connection and pleasure
- Porn creates unrealistic expectationsÂ
The impact of these three problem areas is substantial. Let’s talk about it.
The Problem of Porn’s Focus on the Cumshot…
The majority of porn is a buildup to the cumshot. Each time you watch porn with a cumshot, you’re creating and reinforcing circuits in your brain that associate cumshots with the reward of pleasure leading to long-term psychological issues.
Cumshot compilations amplify this at least 10-fold.
While cumming is great, a hyperfocus on this can impact your psyche while we’re having sex.
For example…
Say you and your partner are 5 minutes into sex, and they start to do something that’s really fucking hot to you. It turns you on even more, and you do one of two things:
- Ejaculate. You give in to your urge to ejaculate, and experience roughly 7 seconds of pleasure followed by a major drop in sexual desire (and often connection).
- Don’t ejaculate. You breathe deeply, make sounds of pleasure, focus on your partner’s body – pausing if you need to – and NOT ejaculate because you want to experience MORE pleasure and MORE connection.
If you regularly watch porn, I’d bet that you’re much more likely to go with option #1 because you have created these neural pathways that link ejaculation with the reward of pleasure, making your average time to ejaculation way lower than you’d want.
Option #2 is the gateway to higher states of pleasure.Â
Almost every multiorgasmic experience I’ve had has happened after I decided not to ejaculate in a decision point like this.
Trust me… I know the draw… Ejaculation can seem like the best (and only) option in the world… but if you hold out for a bit longer, you’ll be amazed by what’s on the other side of option #2.Â
Porn Focuses on the Parts of People
When you think back to the porn that you’ve watched, how much do you remember it showing a genuine connection between humans?Â
How often did it show a man experiencing deep states of pleasure that were unrelated to ejaculation?Â
Rarely, if ever.Â
Most porn focuses on closeup shots of parts interacting (cock in pussy, mouth on cock, etc…), which trains your brain to be turned on by the parts – as opposed to being turned on by the entire gorgeous human laying in front of you that wants you to fuck them – this is one of the biggest negative effects of porn as a whole.Â
If you’re regularly watching porn that focuses on the parts of people when you get into a sexual experience with another human your brain will experience more pleasure when you focus on the parts of the other person – versus the connection and overall pleasure.
This is going to make it more challenging for you to last as long as you want in bed, because your brain won’t have rewards associated with deeper states of pleasure and connection… your brain’s reward centers will be associated with images of parts of people, and images of cumshots.
How would this play out?
You might be more drawn to ejaculate on your partner’s face, or ass, or through oral sex – instead of experiencing the deeper pleasure that can come from longer, mindblowing lovemaking sessions.Â
Porn Creates Unrealistic Expectations
The majority of women don’t want to be jackhammered in the ways depicted in porn, and for you to expect yourself to “perform” like that is going to set you up for failure.
Remember – porn is a performance – performed by actors.
Imagine a porn where the guy is fucking the woman for 10 minutes straight. What you’re not seeing is what happens in between the cuts of the camera angles. The porn actor is probably taking time to cool off between angles so he doesn’t ejaculate. They might even film that 10-minute porn over the course of 2 days. We don’t know…
If you get it in your head that porn-level “performance” is what women want, those unrealistic expectations are going to get in the way of you enjoying sex in a relaxed way (the way that makes it easier to last as long as you want in bed), leading to what everyone calls performance anxiety. No one wants this.Â
And finally…
5. Things to Watch Out For
Too many kegels can hurt you
The internet is full of people saying that kegel exercises, one of the main types of pelvic floor exercises, are the solution to premature ejaculation – that you should be doing as many kegels as possible…Â
The problem is that doing kegels all the time can lead to pelvic floor hypertension, and tension in your pelvic floor muscles leads to premature ejaculation.Â
This is why there are so many men out there who have done kegels every day for months who are still struggling with premature ejaculation.
Think about this…
When is the last time you did 10 sets of 30 squats every day for a month?
Hopefully never… because that would royally fuck up your entire body.
There IS an intelligent way to do kegels, but it’s an area that requires a more in-depth look than what is possible in this guide.Â
If you do everything in this training, you will experience major improvements in your ability to last longer in bed without ever doing a single kegel.Â
Don’t focus too much on not ejaculating during sex
It will make sex MUCH less enjoyable for you.Â
Also, this was one of the main complaints women shared in my survey… specifically that some men were so focused on not ejaculating that the experience wasn’t fun or connective.
It takes some time to get really skilled with controlling your ejaculation, so until you master the art, give yourself permission to enjoy sex without major self-imposed performance pressure.Â
Don’t get down on yourself if you do ejaculate “too early”
Ejaculation does not mean the sexual encounter has to end. How you respond to your premature ejaculation will make or break your sexual connection. Roll with it. Remember that these practices take time.Â
Don’t resort to external means of avoiding the point of no return
There are a ton of different things that guys will do to avoid cumming before they want to – things like a delay spray, a numbing agent, can help for a time, or some guys use the squeeze technique (pause-squeeze method) to prevent themselves from ejaculating.
Some guys even talk about using selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) to hold themselves off – but these things only increase the sexual tension in your PC muscles and make the issue worse over time.
You have to get to the root of the problem instead of putting a band-aid on the problem.
Don’t read this entire guide and then do nothing…
You need to take action if you want to improve your ability to last longer in bed.
Intellectual knowledge alone won’t help you.
Practice, practice, practice.Â
Remember that sex is about much more than lasting forever.
While being able to last as long as you want is important, the MOST important thing is the quality of connection you share with the person you’re having sex with. Sex should be about pleasure, connection, and fun, and not about “trying to get it right.”
SUMMARY
If there was only one best thing to take away from this training and apply it to your life, it would be this:
Change how you masturbate
- Masturbate for a minimum of 20 minutes before you ejaculate. Set a timer.
- Focus on internal sensations (instead of fantasies in your head).
- Practice breathing deeply
- Make sounds and moans of pleasure
- Focus on having an easeful – relaxed presence. Smile to yourself and see just how much you can enjoy this non-rushed experience of sexuality.
- Shift your focus away from the “goal” of cumming, and simply make “pleasure” your goal.
If you do this three times a week for a month straight, you will experience MAJOR improvements in your ability to last longer in bed.Â
WHAT TO DO NEXT?
If you want to go even deeper, and uplevel your sex & relationship life in major ways, sign up for my 5-Week Orgasmic Mastery Online Course which is now open for enrollment. While I’m not a sex therapist or a healthcare provider, I have an extensive history of helping men to improve their sexual health and minimize any form of sexual dysfunction.
That course is going to be a guided deep dive where you will get to master:
- Ejaculation control (with much more depth than what I’ve shared here in this training).
- Taoist & Tantric practices to build your sexual energy & master the art of lovemaking
- The Art of Sexual Leadership
- Sublimation & Sexual Energy Transmutation
If you’re on my email list you’ll get access to a major discount (before the general public gets access to the course at all). If you’re not on my list, make sure to subscribe in the form below.
Thank you for caring about your sex life enough to go through this training.
Please reach out to me with any questions you might have, and remember that your sex life is your responsibility.
Take action today.
-Taylor